Ride Reports
Fort Bill 13th/14th May 2006Words by Steveneep, pictures by Blinkie
“The following report is based on actual events that happened over the weekend 13/14th 2006. Only slight exaggeration has been used in certain instances to make the report interesting.”
9 DH Neeps made the pilgrimage across to Fort Bill for the opening weekend of the World Cup course.
Choda Boy, Spanish Fly, Blinkie (Mr Falloffalot), Numb Nuts, Andyneep, Red Van
Man, Coullneep, Johnno and me.
With only Red Van Man, Johnno and Coullneep (well nae yet) not camping, the
rest were here for a weekend of full on downhill biking, and all the pleasures
that come with a weekend away from our loved ones.
We met at the Nevis Café (first ones there), and had a fat busting boost
to set us up for the day.
Once we had wiped the egg yoke of our chins, we stumped up £18.50 for
our day pass. Well worth the entry fee.
We hotfooted it back to the vans etc to dawn our business suits for the day.
Wasn’t sure whether Johnno was going biking, or going to be a blocker
for the San Francisco 49’ers.
Without any pre-planning each Neep emerged from their respective changing rooms wearing the Neep DH Team kit.
A very impressive site it must be said, and we were not the only ones to comment
on this. Hello Ladieeeeess, I ride for you. YES?!!
With the threat of rain/snow in the weather forecast during the week, we were delighted to be met with warm sunshine.
With Fort Bill there is no mixing with trucks full of smelly DH'ers, you just
share a gondola with at the most 2 smelly DH'ers. Phew!!
All the Neeps were looking forward to everything Fort bill had to throw at us. Good or bad?
We all set off in the unspoken order, just so you dina hold anyone up.
Now, Steve Peat and the likes will do the whole run in about 4 mins 15 secs,
but the Neeps were in far less of a hurry. We weren’t going to be taking
out the picnic rug or anything, but we did have certain stops planned.
For those who haven’t ridden Fort Bill before, it’s hard going from top to bottom, and gives your body a constant battering, even when you do stay on your bike.
But, we managed 5 runs for our day, with only some mechanicals
(Choda & my chain devices, and Red Van Man coming off worst of the day
with a busted rear mech, 3 bust spokes, and a buckled wheel). I think the bikes
get 6 months of battering in just 1 day??
With a great day of riding behind us, we had hopefully somewhere near as good a night out to look forward to.
Food and beer were on the agenda, but not necessarily in that order.
But, first we had to sort our accommodation (Glen Nevis Campsite). With Johnno
and Tam sadly departing, it was left to the rest of to continue the merriment.
Once the tents were up, it was time to relax with a beer or four.
With the sun on our backs, and a beer in our hand, things couldn’t get
much better.
According to Fly there was going to be some rain between 7 and 7.08pm!! But,
there was a spot or two once we had settled down, so this was an excuse for
Fly to reveal his latest purchase. A GAZEEEBO!!!
This thing was so big, that Andyneep could fit his new pride and joy underneath it, and be able to run round it.
Unfortunately, there is no pictorial evidence to back this up, but you will just have to take my word for it.
Showered, and smelling of something sweeter than body armour, and we were set
for town.
Fort William lock up your daughters, and let out your sons.
The Neeps are partial to a Curry when we go away, and Saturday night was going
to be no different.
We had 1 more Neep camping with us, who originally wasn’t going to be
staying. Coullneep.
After getting official approval from “her who must be obeyed”, he
was out for the night.
He also had a to make an important choice of whether to go for the spit roast, or the mild curry. He chose wisely.
We didn’t get many ride photos, as predicted. However, there is curry
house photos in abundance. Tisk!!
After a long journey, a full days biking, a curry, and many beers you think we would be heading home and into our sleeping bags.
Not a chance we slipped on the dance shoes, and edged tentatively towards the
dance floor a bit of New Romantic pouncing about.
Well, only………………….
.... <eyes rolling>
Enough is enough, and we threw in the towel, and headed back to camp for a civilized
POW wow round the gas heater, and then bed.
Morning broke, and we woke with some fuzzy heads, but looking forward to another
days biking.
We thought we might miss the beginning of the uplift, with Blinkie pulling out
all the stops in the kitchen, and managing to get his egg butties down to 15
mins/bun.
We decked ourselves out in the Neep uniform AGAIN, and while we were waiting
Coullneep decided to entertain us with BMX old style tricks.
Little did Barry know, that a couple of runs later he would be hanging in the same position, with no applause.
After a couple of runs Numb Nuts decided to call it quits, and headed home.
Considering this was his first outing since he broke his collarbone, a BIG UP
to him for sticking with it.
Another instance were the Neep uniform caused a stir was by an attractive American
girl, wanting to take our photo. She said her nephew was into extreme sports,
and would go “nuts” seeing us in our Neep attire. The only extreme
thing we did that weekend, was drinking.
We managed another few runs before it was time to call it quits. 5 runs Saturday,
5 runs Sunday. I think we got our monies worth.
Mechanicals were minimal. 4 punctures, 2 chain devices, and one mech was the
sum of our troubles.
Once we changed back into our day clothes, we (apart from the drivers) celebrated the end of the weekend with one final beer, and toasted the hill.
Rather than returning straight home, we decided to head to Aviemore, and go for some grub at the Roo’s Leap.
We all tucked into a light salad and a soft drink, just to keep the hunger pangs away for the journey home.
I think we will need to go some way to get a better weekend.
Biking, camping, food, and the company made it.
Nothing planned till after Morzine, but I’m sure in August we be making a return visit. Check the MSB for rides.
See you on the hills.
Words Steveneep
Swanley Sunday 16th April 2006
Words by Badboy
8 riders in total turned up - Karl, Tim, Tam, Johno, Barry, Gregor, Mark and NeilWeather was excellent and the forest was in good condition with very little muddy sections through the trails. Rode the singletrack down to the ruined cottage then through the forest and on to the burn crossing. It was then back through the burn and up the steep bank and into the forest again to tackle the downhill course. Tim had a bad day at the office with his "wide" handlebars not liking narrow tree gaps! If that wasn't bad enough, soon after he suffered a bent rear hanger which resulted in him limping back to Stoney for an early bath.
The funpark obstacles were tacked before heading back towards the road to head back to Stoney. It was voted to take a left into a route that I can't remember the name of (answers on a postcard please). A few steep decents were tackled before riding the final stretch to Stoney.
All good clean(ish) fun.
Kerloch Sunday 2nd April 2006
Words by HairyNeep, photo's and captions by MadMac:
Drove out to Kerloch this morning and there was already a gathering of cars
but I was surprised to see Wullie standing there ready to ride.
The next surprise was when I looked at the van that had pulled in behind me
and Simon stepped out, followed by Colin Donald. Then to top it all Gazza pulled
in.
It was like I'd gone to bed in 2006 and woken up in 2003.
The other riders were Rob (not Romani), Martin, Scott and Tim (apologies if I've forgotten someone or used the wrong name).
Usual kind of climb, plenty of 4' snow drifts at the top making it impossible to ride. Decsent was sketchy, fast and fun and the singletrack through the heather was like a river. All in all a bloody good ride that had everyone smiling.
Next week I expect to see Johhno, Oldmanshaw, Robbie, Alastair and the rest
Scotty regretted forgetting to bring his prosthetic leg for the ride
are we skiing or cycling.....???
......nope, definitely skiing down
Swanley 12 February 2006
7 riders turned up - Karl, Tim, Rob, Gavin, Zak, Neil & Gaylen.
Weather was good - around 6 deg C and dry. Good ride taking in the daunting road climb up from Stonehaven (I'm sure that gets steeper every time) then into the forest and a left turn into the single track past the ruined cottage and on through the forest and over the river crossing(well nailed by some of the party).
Up and over the back section then to the steep sections before crossing back across the river (several routes were taken down the steep section) hats off to Rob who managed the steepest section in one and without wet shorts (as experienced by a certain member of the party who shall remain nameless ).
Onto the downhill section and then on to the obstacles - the boardwalk and seesaw were attempted by some after a comprehensive demonstration by 2 of the Mountain Maniacs. Then it was on to the rock drop and the second boardwalk with the drop-off which were tried by and nailed by some.
All in all a good ride - where's next??
Reporter: BadBoy
Loch Muick & Fungle Double Header
This was a really great weekend of mountain biking and by way of a short introduction, John, Kinnon and I are forty(ish) year olds who love just getting out and enjoying some challenging cross-country which these routes offer. Although we really like descents (who doesn’t?!!), we are definitely not down-hill adrenaline junkies. Unfortunately because of all our work commitments and the other stuff that has to be done we don’t get out to play on our bikes as often as we’d like so our fitness level is probably closer to Neil rather than Lance (Armstrong)!
Having broken our camping/cycling duck on an absolutely brilliant weekend in the Lake District earlier in the year we wanted to try something nearer to home so plans were hatched to tackle a route that would include an over-night stop in the hills. Studying the ride reports on the site the Tomintoul route seemed like a good possibility, but a Sunday stroll around Loch Muick hatched an alternative plan – we’d cycle in following the Neep’s route to Glen Clova, camp over-night then cycle on looping round to Loch Negarr and back down the road in time for tea and scones. Hmmm, a little ambitious perhaps?
Undeterred by advice from those who knew better we spent an evening practise packing the gear we’d need to survive a night away from central heating and duvets. Err, perhaps we could commandeer a mountain goat near the car-park or a passing Chinooke to air-lift it all in, nae chance this lot was going to stay attached to bikes or bodies tackling the track into Glen Clova so common sense prevailed and we change the plan to camping in Ballater, doing a route on Saturday then another on Sunday. This is how we came to be pitching a tent early Saturday morning the first weekend of October.
Tea’s up!
Dae Won
Things didn’t start too well for me when I discovered that despite all efforts to be prepared I’d forgotten my shorts which were unfortunately at home sitting next to my waterproof jacket – bummer!. Fortunately John came to the rescue with a loan of his spare shorts and off we set to tackle Loch Muick.
A combination of wind and horizontal rain made the lower path around the Loch seem a bit tempting when we reached the first fork to begin the long climb to the summit where even pech stops were kept short to keep bodies warm. The surface was well compacted with a few loose sections but up to this point lack of grip wasn’t an issue.
The car’s back there somewhere
After a couple of false starts with down-hill sections quickly leading into climbs the steep decent into Glen Clova began for real and boy did it start with our brakes squealing trying to scrub excess speed negotiating the switch-back hair-pins, this was what it was all about and making the climbing worth while. The top third was a combination of slightly wider track bordered by closely cropped grass but this quickly became looser and rockier single track weaving between boulders. We “stopped” a couple of times during the decent after I managed a couple of “Supermans” (or should that be complete prats!) over the bars to give our bodies and brakes a breather, each time starting out thinking its going to start levelling out soon but no there was more and then some more eventually leading into woods with soap-bar roots because of the rain that continued to swirl in the wind. Some short technical sections took us out onto the main track leading up the Glen or down to the visitors centre – we headed down to the centre for our scoff and a break from the weather.
I think I’ll stop HEEEEERE!
Revived and revitalised we head back up the Glen to pick our way through boggy ground and sheep tracks following the river, heeding the advise on the route plan not to follow the track into the woods, eventually reaching a bridge that any other day we would have ridden over but because of the gale blowing we were struggling to keep our balance on the bikes at slow seed so erred on the side of caution. Moving up from the bridge we soon found that the track became more like a river bed with slippy loose rocks on the steady climb making progress on the bikes impossible (for our skills anyway!). Eventually we reach the top of the Glen to cross the river once more and start the climb/carry out.
Bloody tourist!
Things you don’t really consider drooling over the latest full-sus creation in magazines is how easy (or not!!) they are to carry for any length of time. My Blur is not the worst by a long way but by the time we were on bikeable terrain again I was really missing being able to just throw it across my back like John and Kinnon with their hardtails. Anyway, a quick stop by the wooden shack then off towards what we knew would be a great descent. The wind had really got going by this time on the exposed plateau overlooking the Loch and we had to pedal down reasonable drops just to keep moving. Unfortunately we missed the chance to stop and take in the views favouring forward progress to get out of the battering and stinging rain. The walkers we passed who were also descending just couldn’t hear us coming until we were really close because of the wind noise but we did our best to give them plenty room. The “Streak of Lightning” proved to be a terrific blast for John and me as we struggled for grip on the loose surface braking heavily for the hair-pins then accelerating down the steep incline. Numb hands spoiled Kinnon’s braking feel so he eased off slightly but still joined us at the bottom with a big cheesy grin and a verdict of “superb!”. An uneventful spin along the Loch-side track took us back to the car park.
The decision to use the Ballater campsite was further endorsed by being able to soak in steaming hot showers leaving us with a glow of contentment as we wolfed down our meal of Chilli & Cous-Cous (thanks Ang!) back at the tent. A few beers and a discussion about our plans for the next day reached the conclusion that it would be The Firmouth & Fungle, the lure of “….probably the best section of single track in the North East area” made up our minds.
Dae Two
A quick round of tea and bacon rolls before the tent was packed then off to Aboyne. We followed the B### out of town heading towards ####. Immediately after crossing the first bridge we hung a left and followed the tarred single-track road for approx 1 mile to find a decent parking spot. We set off in glorious sun-shine and all thoughts of forgotten waterproofs were far from our minds, but was it going to hold?
Heading up the signposted track obviously popular with Sunday morning walkers judging by the number of people we passed, the track was easy going with a mixture of short climbs followed by rolling descents. Following the route plan we started the last big climb within the woodlands until we broke out of the trees into open hill-side. The sun was still shining and a lunch stop to take in the stunning views over Dee-side was one of those “what a wonderful world” moments.
On the saddle once more we try our best to pedal as much of the climb before us but eventually found that pushing makes steadier progress because of the loose surface. A combination of pushing and pedalling brought us to the first summit. Well, what goes up..... and we carry on to drop down following the loose track carved out of the soft ground. The decent, although not super fast was really rewarding for the technical content and it was soon into another long climb. Once on top we spin over the mixed surface weaving through the boggy sections until the track begins to drop and speeds pick up until we’re at “buzz level” playing with brakes to keep control on the loose surface. We keep an eye out for the Fungle road that will take us on our return loop and all too quickly we come to the junction complete with a helpful signpost.
Turning left and now on the Fungle road proper our progress continues following the hill contours until the track becomes less obvious and reduces to single file. At this point I have to take the blame for leading us off the intended route and we end up looking down on the real track below us in the Glen. The only thing to do was take the direct route bounding through the heather and bracken using our bikes for support. Once on the proper, newly resurfaced track our speed quickly rose, sucked in by the super smooth surface and swooping bends until I rounded a corner (way too fast) to find the track turning and dropping rapidly to the left over a bridge. With the imminent prospect of a seriously painful stack I managed to loose just enough speed to make it onto the bridge and over to thank the God of disc brakes. John, following close behind spotted my skid marks ahead just in time and began to brake to make it safely.
The route continues through the Glen and into a field with another signpost where we took the track marked for Aboyne. We soon had to ford a burn that provided an amusing challenge to see who could make it across in the saddle without putting a foot down - none of us made it but it was fun trying. A pech stop to refuel with home-made flap-jacks (thanks yet again Ang!) before the last big climb then onwards and upwards. The miles of the past two-days were starting to take their toll and we had to work together at a steady pace to keep up our progress. Then almost out of nowhere we spotted the sign for the Fungle path leading off to the left and the fun began. All aches and pains were quickly forgotten as we barrelled down the single track we’d so looked forwards to trying. It had a mix of everything and was absolutely brilliant blast. Unfortunately Kinnon was temporarily halted by a jammed chain but once cleared we were soon on our way again to eventually arrive out onto the B#### after some seriously quick descending on the access track to the woodland cottages.
Back at the car we all had smug grins of seriously contented mountain bikers. No serious problems and great weather on Sunday made it a definite “must do again”.
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